For most people a car is a luxury item but for me it’s a necessity! But for some reason people can’t understand this!! So let me explain!
Once again our car is playing up and I’m dreading that we are going to be without a car AGAIN!
The reason I am dreading this is because I rely on our car to be able to leave house as due to my mental illness I cannot get on any public transport so that means I then become housebound (no exaggeration)
So I do get annoyed when people say “can’t you get on the bus” “public transport is cheaper” and yes maybe they are right but those people can’t even begin to understand the distress that using public transport causes me. Which then means we have to use taxis which are really expensive!
Another thing with a taxi is it still causes me to become distressed maybe not quite as distressed as getting on public transport but the fact I have to get in the car with a total stranger just scares me which means Lee has to come everywhere whereas when I have my car I can do little journeys to the shop or to family members house but when I don’t I literally just stay at home and become more and more depressed.
What annoys me tho is that for some reason people can’t get this into their head that without a car my mental illness just becomes worse and worse as I have no escape so my agoraphobia becomes worse, my anxiety becomes more extreme and my suicidal thoughts and urges to self harm become so much more intense.
Like sometimes when I am really bad Lee will just take us on a drive to keep me safe from myself and get me out of my head and away from danger.
So for me having a car is pretty much essential for my mental health and that is not an exaggeration. The only person who actually knows and understands how bad I get when we don’t have a car is Lee and I’m sure he would tell you that sometimes it’s scary how fast my mental health crashes.
The best way I can describe the feeling of not having a car to me is like loosing a family member suddenly that is what it feels like to me that gut wrenching feeling is the feeling I get from not having the safety of a car!
Yes I know cars are expensive and constantly cost money and do stress me out but that stress is nothing compared to how I am without a car!!
The car is not just important to me but to Lee also as when he coaches football he literally has to carry 3 massive bags full of equipment which would be ridiculous to drag on and off public transport and where he coaches is in the middle of nowere!
I could go on forever about why having a car is much more of a necessity for me than just something that is nice to have.
I hope I have got my point across! Does anyone else with mental health problems feel this way about their car! Like it is the only way you feel safe to leave the house!
Thanks for reading! Don’t forget to subscribe😘
Love to you all